Big Brother Africa: Why I'm the "Need Not Apply" Candidate!

Big Brother Africa (BBA) auditions are here again! Well, at least that's what I heard on the radio. I must admit that I quite the reality television nut. There is something alluring about watching real people facing real challenges or just making a fool of themselves on TV. I enjoyed the recently-ended Da Viva Sew Project on Ghana Television, I used to love watching people descend into Lord of the Flies-esque chaos on Survivor and MTV Real World marathons were always a wonderful source of inspr...procrastination.

Aside from cheese, clogs, windmills and Rutger Hauer, Big Brother is clearly the best thing to come out of the Netherlands! The first Big Brother Africa was a particular joy to watch. One of my bestest buddies from high school was selected to represent her country and opted to make it a complete surprise. You can imagine my shock on the opening night when my brother pointed out that there was a person in the house that looked a lot like her.... even sounded a lot like her....HANG ON...was her!! She made us all proud during her stint in the house. Even though I’m a fan of watching strangers sit around all day and get on each others' nerves, I have been contemplating the reasons why I would never survive in the Big Brother Africa house:



1. Not Ghanaian enough: Let's face it, my fellow Ghanaians would vote me off first. My presence in the house would be a source of irritation and out-rage and I'm inclined to agree with them. Although my accent has lost most of its foreign inflections (after years of constant practice), the average Ghanaian would be quick to detect that I'm a foreign inter-loper not worthy to represent Mother Ghana. Indeed this may be true. After all:

• I do not have any Ghanaian boarding school hazing experiences…I was bullied in boarding school elsewhere.
• I never read Courtesy for Boys and Girls
• The only time I watched the popular show Osofo Dadzie was on holiday or when some family friend had a bulky VHS tape from the Motherland

2. The Bore factor: I’m actually quite an un-interesting person. It is very rare to see me throw caution to the wind. I have had very few wild and wacky moments....(well, my friend Sagar would beg to differ but lets ignore him!) ….I just cannot see myself doing body shots of tequila off the armpits of strangers or playing truth or dare naked in a hot-tub.



3. The (Dreaded) Shower Hour: A guy I know tuned in to Big Brother Africa ONLY for the famed shower hour. This is enough to prevent me from EVER auditioning for the show.



4. I'm a news junkie: I need to know what is happening in the world around me. I cannot imagine being cut-off from the news for 90 days..even news about family and friends counts. In 2007, Big Brother Australia was under fire for not telling a contestant that her father had passed away. Scary world we live in...



5. The Age Factor: I will not lie...I'm no spring chicken! I know Big Brother UK does have a taste for more "mature" contestants but alas, this is Big Brother Africa and:

• The averge BBA candidate probably remembers enjoying Britney Spears' Baby one more time as their first video as a kid. I on the other hand enjoyed Billie Jean as my first video and REMEMBER the Thriller hype.**

• The average BBA contestant probably grew up listening to Westlife and think of the Backstreet Boys and N 'sync as classic boy-bands.....I grew up listening to New Edition and think of the Jackson 5** as a classic boy-band.

There are so many other reasons to mention but there is really no point since I would probably not make it past the first round of selections anyway! Sigh...I will have to be content enjoying Big Brother Africa from the comfort of my couch.

**Ironically, references to Michael Jackson were made before his untimely departure.

Michael Jackson: Farewell to an Icon

As one of my friends said on Facebook, she just assumed he was immortal. There was indeed some undeniable invincible/immortal quality about Michael Jackson and so his sudden passing on the same day as Farrah Fawcett is still hard to believe.
Though I have not really been a fan of MJ since I was kid, the Billie Jean video was the first video I ever saw and he was my first crush at the age of 7. Like scores of little girls across the globe, I was going to marry Michael Jackson! To children growing up in the 70s he will probably be remembered as the the fresh-faced star of the Jackson 5. For us 80s kids who literally witnessed the physical and iconic transformation of Michael Jackson from Thriller to Bad, he will forever be our childhood hero. For 90s kids, who came to know MJ when he was already a massive international phenomenon, he will be associated with a perchance for plastic surgery, grand videos and eccentric ways. Just this morning I have been reflecting on the fact that for children growing up in the 2000s like my nieces, he would probably be remembered as a freakishly weird reclusive star with classic hits that are sometimes played on the radio.

Love him or hate him what is undeniable is the influence of Michael Jackson on R&B and popular music. He has indeed left an awesome musical legacy. For me, the Michael I will always want to remember is the one from the Billie Jean video. Rest in Peace Michael Jackson.

Farewell to the King? : The Reported Demise of El Hadj Omar Bongo Ondimba

Source: Associated Press

On Sunday evening, news agencies worldwide were reporting that the man who held the dubious title of "Africa's longest serving leader" had finally met his demise. This coveted crown, once held by Mr. Kamuzu Banda of Malawi, was all set to be passed on to another leader such as Mr Muammar al-Gaddafi of Libya. Just when the world was coming to grips with the passing of the de facto King of Gabon, the Gabonese authorities refuted all death claims. According to them, Mr. Bongo is very much alive and is continuing his "holiday" in Spain. Alas, it appears that good people of Gabon are the only ones who actually believe that Omar Bongo is still with us. Wikipedia has already written him off and have updated their 'Omar Bongo' page stating his death as 7 June 2009.

Why am I so fascinated? Well, out of all the countries I have visited, my trip to Gabon last year was truly unforgettable. I was there for 2 months and during that time I failed to really understand the country. From the unspoiled beaches to the rich lush equatorial forests, it is still very hard to describe Gabon. A nation full of contradictions; extreme wealth coupled with extreme poverty. The entire nation is adorned with sign-boards with Mr. Bongo's picture, monuments celebrating him and a Presidential palace that makes the White House look like a quaint country club. The Gabonese people were equally fascinating. Customer service has a unique meaning in Gabon and a visit to Libreville is not recommended for someone looking for a budget vacation. Yet, Libreville has an undeniable vibrant pulse. I will never forget the beautiful Italian restaurant we ate in that was literally on water or the wonderfully paved streets. I spent most of my time in the provincial town of Lambaréné which has a strange 1950s colonial feel with great roads, bridges, rivers and fantastic lighting.

I'm certain that Mr. Bongo has left this world to join his long-departed contemporaries but I'm also sure that the Gabonese authorities will deny the news while they strategise how best to prevent the country falling apart like a house of cards. Will power continue to rest in the hands of the Bongo family and the ruling elite? Does the death of Mr. Bongo pave the way for real power to go to the people for the first time since 1967? The possibilities are infinite. In the meantime, we can always enjoy Gabonese rap courtesy of Eben Entertainment family.

Espoir (Hope) Ba'Ponga of Eben Entertainment